There comes a point in life where you must choose peace of mind over anything else. No matter what is at stake, what relationships will flow away with the wind, you have to say goodbye in order to move on with your own life. To move on from the anxiety, the sadness, the drama of it all and decide that you choose your own mental health over all of this.
I have been in a weird mood lately. I’m finding myself to be in that state more often than usual and I don’t know how to help myself get back to normalcy. But I do know that any other stressors in my life that I can let go of, I should. I need to find my way back to myself and do all that I can to ensure that I live the life I deserve. I do not deserve to be questioned on trivial topics that have no real meaning in life. I do not deserve to be treated like a side show that anyone can just start shit with whenever they’re bored. I do not deserve to be anyone’s back up plan or last choice.
I feel that I am still too close to it all. Jacksonville is where pretty much all of my family is and I’m tired of secluding myself yet still being surrounded. I need to get out of here because sometimes it feels as if I can’t breathe here. It’s time for me to move on to my next chapter and find the true peace of mind I’ve always been searching for. I’ve been more distant as I am finally creating my own chapter, no longer apart of anyone else’s. Sometimes I just feel like I’m so separated that I truly feel like I’m out in the world alone.
I need peace of mind. I need tranquil surroundings. I need no more drama. I need happiness and freedom. I need air to breathe and I need a change.. Mental health will always take priority in my book. Your mind controls your life so I must be strong enough for myself to put a stop to anything and anyone who brings me down. It ends here and it’s a hard goodbye to those I will lose in the process.